Shortbread Squares

I’ve decided that one of the worst things about becoming a parent is that – just when you’ve finally gotten rid of all of the unnecessary people in your life – you now have to meet a whole NEW set of folks, most of which are totally weird and who you’d otherwise never want to associate with in any way.

Fortunately for us, we’ve managed to maintain our antisocial tendencies very well, only preserving friendships with the handful of people up here who we actually LIKE – though I’d have to believe that, come September, all of that will change and we’ll have to at least pretend to be normal, for B’s sake.

When that happens and I’m forced to bring food to various people’s houses, I’m totally making this 3-ingredient shortbread, which came from a close family friend. In fact, I’ve made it a few times for our current friends and they’re all still alive, so that’s something…

SHORTBREAD SQUARES INGREDIENTS:

• 1 stick salted butter, softened
• 2oz sugar (AKA 1/4 cup)
• 5oz all-purpose flour (AKA a little less than 2/3 cup)

SHORTBREAD SQUARES INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees.
2. Cream butter and sugar together until light and fluffy – this means turning your stand mixer up to a medium-high and letting it go wild for about 2 minutes.
3. Lower the speed to “low” and gradually add in the flour.
4. Bring mixture together with your fingertips and press into a lightly floured 7″ baking tin. I’ve used loaf pans, 8″ cake pans and small ramekins and they’ve all been fine – just look in the oven a few minutes earlier or later if you chose a wider/flatter vs a narrower/deeper pan to tell when it’s done.
5. Prick well all over with a fork to create a “ridge” edge – this helps it brown.
6. Bake for about 40 minutes (5 min less or more depending on the size of your pan). You’ll know it’s done if you see that the edges have browned and a toothpick in the center comes out clean.

Leave the shortbread in the pan for 5 minutes, then cut it into rectangular biscuits.

Oh, and wear spandex if you’re intending to partake because you’ll need it.